Snot, My Wallet and Time Machines

Oh my god. I wish I could describe in the detail necessary for you to actually understand just what a whiny sick baby I have been for the last two and a half days. But I can’t. Its simply not possible for the level of shitty-babyness to be articulated. La is also sick, and is equally whiny in her sickness, which could have spelled some relationship woes for us but, luckily, we just conceded that we couldn’t take care of one another, as sucky as that was, and went on whining from our respective couches. 

My snot is beginning to thin out enough to at least be taken care of, and while that means that I’ve developed a cough as well, it is also a good sign that I’m on the upswing. I’ve also made it through almost an entire workday without verbalizing how sorry I feel for myself. So, I’m definitely on the mend.

Compounding the sickness, I somehow managed to lose my wallet between getting coffee with my co-workers on Monday and stopping by the store to buy nyquil and OJ on Tuesday afternoon. My wallet is a huge thing, like, bigger than some women’s clutch purses. I am also religious about keeping things ‘in their home’ (La will attest to this and also tell you how it impacts her life negatively.) So I’m still unsure how it got lost. When I realized I didn’t have it on me (while at the check-out to buy the nyquil . . .and an old neighbor happened to have been in front of me in line and when she heard what happened quickly jumped in and paid for my groceries! Because the universe was definitely looking out for me!) I assumed it was in one of a few places. But it wasn’t! It hasn’t been in any of the places it could have been, but also, NONE of the cards were used, which should maybe restore my faith in humanity but actually makes me believe that it is still just hiding somewhere.

I have cancelled and reordered all my cards, went to the DMV this morning for a new license, and mourned the loss of my 10% off coffee and pastries at the best coffee shop near work card. So, probably that means my wallet will end up being found now. I should also add that it was a Coach wallet, which I could never, ever afford on my own, and was a gift from my friend, SH. Sad days, friends. SAD. I’m also pretty fucking nervous about the fact that ALL the things with my name, address and other vitals were in that wallet. Like, seriously, probably everything someone would need to open credit cards in my name and stuff. Damn. Any advice on protecting my identity? 

In my final non-update of the day, a friend posted an article from NPR about Tori Amos last night, and because I spent from roughly 15-25 in a slightly Tori Amos obsessed state, I of course used spotify to listen to like every album she’s ever put out (not really, because if you are a TA fan you will know she is so prolific and it would take way more than one day to listen to all of her albums!) including the rare B sides I used to own but were stolen from my car (along with all my other tapes and CDs) and which I cried over for days. I’ll be honest that Tori has dropped off my radar of late – the last time I saw her live was in 2007, probably the same year I last bought an album – but I still have a deep, deep love for her early stuff and have found I really like some of her newer songs as well. Still, nothing can put me back into my red VW bug (1972), crying over unrequited love on my way to Larkspur, Co. to work on the cast of the Renaissance festival faster than “Little Earthquakes.”

And yes, you read all of that correctly and I am totally that gay, woo-woo, Tori Amos, witchy, ren-faire loving girl you are imagining. or I was until I maybe got some better style. I read an article about the types of college roommates you could have, and one genre was the Tori Amos listening depressive lesbian. And then I realized that I had been someone’s personal stereotype. And I’m ok with it. I threw in a lot of Morissey, The Cure, Depeche Mode, and New Order, too. As you may have guessed, I was a true ray of sunshine in my adolescence. 

Speaking of rays of sunshine . . .tomorrow at 3pm begins my 72 hours sans caffeine. Who wants to bet if it’ll be headaches, unrelenting sobbing, or both this weekend?!


8 thoughts on “Snot, My Wallet and Time Machines

    • YES! Have you listened to her new album? Her daughter sings on a couple of tracks, and its lovely and helloo, can you even imagine being TORI AMOS’ KID?!? The album is called “Unrepentant Geraldines” and my fave track is called “Promise” – get on it! (I’m sure it’ll help with late term pregnancy issues! 😉 )

      • I haven’t heard it yet. I have a daunting to do list with my iTunes, so I have been avoiding it all together. I have a sizable gift card that needs to be used too.

      • I’m a big spotify fan at work, its the only possible way for me to listen to anything new. I’m way too wienie about my itunes.

  1. Now that you’ve re-ordered cards, the wallet will turn up. Under your car seat or something like that. That’s just how the universe works! And I know as far as credit cards/debit cards go, if you cancel them and order new ones, which you’ve done, that helps a lot at least with the financial side of potential identity theft. As long as your social security card wasn’t in your wallet it would be more difficult for people to do a whole lot with canceled bank cards and an invalid ID. Though they could probably get away with stealing your 10% off cafe card. 😉

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