Bumps and Bruises

Yesterday, Seafoam graduated from embryo to fetus! Hooray, Seafoam! Congratulations!

I would have liked to celebrate this accomplishment on behalf of my little stowaway, but we were too busy getting checked out at the emergency room.

Driving home from work yesterday, I was turning left into my neighborhood, stopped to wait for opposing traffic to pass. Because this is a busy but still residential street, there is no turn lane – only a single lane of traffic each way. I had been stopped for 45 seconds to a minute waiting for the other cars to pass, when a van slammed into the back of my car. I don’t think the woman driving even put on her breaks – just kept on going as though I wasn’t even there. If I had to guess, I’d say she hit me going about 35 mph.

My airbags didn’t deploy (which is generally a good thing) and I had my seatbelt on, so I didn’t hit my head or really experience any significant physical harm, minus the whiplash that was inevitable. I immediately called 911 though, because my first thought was seafoam and what kind of experience he might have had in the crash. 

The woman who hit me begged me not to call the police, and then tried to collect my name and phone number and head out. This should have been a clue that what had started in stupidity was probably going to end there as well. I told her she could do what she felt she needed, but that I’d already called the police and she’d be facing another ticket if she left. Before she could decide to leave, a firetruck and ambulance showed up, so she didn’t have a choice.

The EMT’s checked me out and decided I likely didn’t have any injuries, but advised me to go to the ER to make sure Seafoam was ok. We waited around for the cops to collect the information they needed and – sure enough – the other driver didn’t have insurance. So, I left with her name and address and while La drove me to the ER, we called our insurance agent. We do have uninsured motorist coverage, which will pay the medical expenses, but we will have to front our deductible for the damages to my car. $500 we don’t have for a mistake that wasn’t mine.

At the ER, they drew blood to see if seafoam’s blood had mixed with mine (both BFF and I are Rh+ though, so it doesn’t make much difference) and did an abdominal ultrasound (weird and wonderful to not have dildo-cam!) which showed Seafoam still happily floating around, heart beating away. I have a follow up with the midwife next week, but it all seems good. No bleeding or cramping since then – so I think we are probably in the clear.

My car, however, is another story. We went to a body shop to just get a ballpark, and he said the visible damage was at least $2500, and because the van hit my station wagon where the gate met the bumper with a pretty good amount of force, if the floor in the back of the wagon is buckled (which could very well be) it is likely a total loss.

For those of you still under the impression that a totaled car = a new awesome ride, I am here to tell you that, especially if you have a financed car (which I do) it could very well mean no car + car payment, depending on what you have left to pay and what the insurance company pays. 

So, now we wait for the adjuster and the awful, teeth pulling insurance process. This is the third time I’ve been in an accident in the last 6 years – none of them even remotely my fault. I’m kind of feeling bitter about it all. And the no insurance is rage-inducing. The problem is, I also know that not buying insurance is likely the result of poverty, so its hard for me to feel fully righteous in my anger. That said, I get having to make choices about what you pay for, and I’ve gotta say that I feel different about decisions that impact other people. Insurance is to cover your ass, but its also to make sure you don’t totally fuck someone else over.

But, we’re ok. And we have the money to pay the deductible. And if the car is totaled, we’ll figure something out. But I’d be ok if this was the extent of the drama in my pregnancy. 

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16 thoughts on “Bumps and Bruises

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  1. I’m so sorry…it’s infuriating when you end up being the one to pay, when it wasn’t your fault. But I’m glad little seafoam seemed undisturbed by the whole event! Sounds like he’s going to be an easygoing little guy. 🙂

  2. I am so very glad that you and Seafoam are okay!!! How scary! I’m sorry to hear about the accident and that the other person had no insurance. I hope everything works out for the best!

  3. Oh, NO! I am so sorry to hear this. It SUCKS that you’re the ones stuck with the bill because she’s uninsured. How is that even fair?

    I’m so glad you and Seafoam are okay, though.

  4. I’m really glad Seafoam is okay. Everyone I know who has been in accidents lately, it always seems like the other driver is uninsured.

    It really sucks about the car. I hope the insurance people aren’t evil.

  5. Good grief! I’m sorry for the massive pain in the ass (and neck) this has caused you all. I am so glad you and Seafoam are overall okay and hoping (a) the car’s not totalled; and (b) insurance behaves less brutally than insurers usually do. I’ve been hit by an uninsured driver and because he was also without a valid driver’s licence (for failing to pay child support (!?! jackass!) and avoided the cops when they tracked him down, I had to go do a photo-lineup to see if I recognized him. Of course I didn’t.

    The lesson I learned was to ask for the other driver’s DL, not just insurance and registration, and call the cops if they don’t have one. From your experience I guess the lesson should be to call 911 regardless. Finally, may I just rant? If a person is too poor to buy insurance, they should at minimum be watching where the *&^$@ they are going and what’s in front of them. Or take the bus. It’s a lot cheaper than driving. Oh wait, maybe not if you don’t buy insurance!

  6. Sorry to hear this. I hope you’re not too sore. The combination of relaxin and whiplash can be nasty. Glad Seafoam is happily floating around. Congrats on graduating to fetus status!

  7. That is the worst! It sucks to have that happen. But wait, can’t you get in a shitload of trouble for being uninsured? Here in NY, they will impound your vehicle! It sucks to have to worry about car insurance, getting a new car, dealing with mechanics, but as long as little Seafoam is ok, screw that other stuff! It’s important, but not so much! Glad you are both fine!

  8. Ugh. What a shit situation. Hopefully the other driver at least got a ticket for the careless driving and not having insurance, since we are a no-fault state or whatever it’s called. If you have to drive uninsured the least you could do is try not to drive like a total idiot. Anyway, glad you both are okay!

  9. So glad you and Seafoam are OK! Kudos to you on having some empathy for the driver w/o insurance. That said, your anger is justifiable, too. I was upside-down in a car loan after my car was totaled once. It was rough. Luckily, I had some student loan money for grad school coming in at the time, so I was able to use that to pay the balance. But for a few months I had two car payments. I consider myself lucky to be able to scrape the money together at the time, but it was really tight. I hope you get enough to cover your loss! I’m REALLY glad you and Seafoam are OK.

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and baby makes 3

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the snearses

some vegetables, some cats

The MD & Me

~ my not so glamorous but oh so blessed life ~

Star In Her Eye

raising a rare girl

Mama et Maman

A blog about two moms trying to conceive

Becoming Mommy and Mama

Two ladies on a baby adventure

YoungIVFerChantelle

My journey to get my Miracle.

single ma in siberia

a single Australian queer's TTC quest/ parenthood journey

babamimi

"Your family needs a reality TV show"

Our Egg, Her Nest?

My journey to Motherhood through gestational surrogacy

Raising Race Conscious Children

a resource for talking about race with young children

Three Hearts Beating

Two lesbian mamas make some queer spawn...

Papa Bear

how two boys made a baby

midwestmammas

lesbian, parenting, ttc, lgbt, baby

and baby makes 3

two moms and a new baby

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