“It’s not gas.” (17 weeks)

First, a couple of follow ups:

1) THANKS to all of you who weighed in on the work issue. I appreciated the affirming, the snarky, the critical and the resourceful feedback I got. The saga continues to unfold and, in fact, I got some downright concerning info from one of the youth she works with (not of the illegal/abusive variety, so don’t worry) and that may end up being a game changer. In any case, all of it is helpful for me to become a better manager. I especially appreciate those of you with expertise in the non profit world, and those coming from other industries – it’s SO easy to get locked in our own worldview.

2) RE: my 16w picture (aside: I’m gonna do a selfie at home for today’s 17 weeks since La is just too busy – I’ll post it later) and my comments about my “fat girl baby bump” – Y’all, I’m fat. No no, don’t say I’m not. Why? well, #1- I AM and #2- Fat is NOT A BAD WORD, or at least, I am trying with all my body and soul to make it not be a bad word. Fat is a descriptor, in the same way “tall” or “brunette” are. We live in a culture that actively hates fat people and makes our lives harder, but that’s not the adipose tissue’s fault – it’s our culture’s! Fat does NOT equal lazy, stupid, ignorant, ill health, or anything else. It just means I have more adipose tissue on me than others do. So while I know that your comments came from big, open, beautiful hearts – I want to correct you. I AM fat. I am ALSO pregnant. That’s a complicated thing in our culture, but I’m doing my best to be both and be happy and healthy and awesome, too! That doesn’t mean I don’t struggle with what it means to be fat in our fat hating world, but that I do my damndest to consciously change some of the stories about fatness – for myself and others. ❤

And now, onward!

I am still having awful post nasal drip which results in awful coughing/hacking in the morning and a hoarse voice all day. (This sucks most especially because I am a singer and would like to be able to sing at my rehearsals!) Goofy the Midwife told me to try muci.nex and robitu.ssin, so that is what I will try. I was sort of hoping for a somewhat more confident answer but . . .alas.

I have gained a mere pound in the last 5 weeks (from 12w to 17w) bringing the total to 4lbs for pregnancy. I’m happy with this because I have not limited or monitored myself at all – I’ve just eaten intuitively and healthfully (mostly) and given into what I’m lucky are fairly healthy cravings (I seriously cannot eat enough soup and salad bars!) It’s weird, though, to be eating more than usual + feel bigger/not fit into your clothes and still have only gained a single pound. That’s a definite mind fuck!

Seafoam was easy to find, hanging out right on my left side, and his heart was happily pumping away at 141bpm. It was so much louder than last time! My uterus is just shy of my belly button, which is also somehow a weird thing for me to consider.

Our anatomy scan is coming up – she put in the orders for it today and we will schedule on Monday. I’m excited to see the dude since we haven’t had a glimpse since about 8 weeks. I understand he will look much more human (and less gummy bear) like!

I have also gotten a bit more tipped forward and can feel a bit of a waddle beginning. Also weird.

Finally in exciting fetus updates: I am 99% sure I’ve felt the dude a few times. I felt something I’d describe as a “tickle scratch” last Friday at an early morning work meeting. I thought it might be him, but wrote it off. A few times since, I’ve felt what I’d describe as a butterfly-in-the-belly feeling, but more solid. When I told Goofy this, she assured me it was Seafoam. “It’s not gas, my friend. That is not indigestion.” I’m, of course, looking forward to his movements being a little more intentional, but I’ll take the tiny nudges in the meantime!

Halfway, HO! 20 weeks is in sight!


13 thoughts on ““It’s not gas.” (17 weeks)

  1. Try homeopathy for your congestion! I can find you links to info to figure out which one, but it is fairly easy to find online. It helped me get through a sinus infection and is safe for breastfeeding and pregnancy.

  2. I’m looking fwd to your selfie AND I respect your feelings and you can think what you want about your own body. I will never comment on your size.

    You must, however, know some of us have a really negative association with calling anyone or being called fat, no matter how overweight anyone is. Just the same as I know some small, slim women complain about being called short, cute, or skinny. I personally was called fat a lot growing up, despite only being slightly overweight at the time, and as a result have battled with my relationship with food all my life.

    • Oh I Totally get it! That’s part of the reason I’m trying to undo some of that by using the word positively (or at least neutrally) to describe myself. I’ve been fat my whole life and it’s a word that’s been used to hurt and degrade me. But, like others have done with words used to harm in the past, I’m reclaiming it and trying to take it back. I also think it’s ok to just name what your body is/does. And, it’s cool if you don’t want to call me or yourself fat. ❤

  3. That’s awesome news.

    Think I’m starting to feel beansprout also, it feels like “popping” inside – like if you melt an aero chocolate bar on your tongue. I still think it’s gas every now and again. Lol.

  4. Try a nasal rinse. It’s gross and uncomfortable, but is completely safe during pregnancy and clears the mucus up immediately (it’ll come back is the only bad thing).

  5. Netipot for the post nasal drip. It’s just salt water, and will physically flush it out. You look fabulous. Just saw the baby bump pic! So exciting about the kicks and good luck on the anatomy scan on Monday!

  6. I am so glad you’re pregnant before me. Your attitude about fat + pregnant is setting such a great example for me. I can’t believe you’re at 17 weeks already. It feels like time is flying!

  7. My nose ran something fierce when I was pregnant. Not just run but it was clogged up ALL the time and blowing it out would nearly make me hurl every time. I had some success with a saline spray.

  8. I totally get the same issue with people telling me I’m not fat. I am fat. I have dubbed myself the “fat friend” and my friends hate it. Eh, oh well! I think it’s awesome that you are coming with a healthy self image of yourself. It’s not a negative word – it doesn’t have to be a negative word. You are beautiful! I am just so happy that the bump is here!

  9. Being a big girl myself, I don’t give to shits if anyone calls me fat! You’re stating the obvious guy! This is such a great way to look at it. We give words power, and if you don’t then it doesn’t really mean much does it? As far as the drip and congestion stuff, Callie has tried everything and it hasn’t worked (not meant to discourage you, but it’s a reality). You’re body will naturally produce more mucus because of pregnancy. We go through a box of tissues a week. In fact, if I see another damn snot filled tissue lying around my freaking apartment, I’m moving out! I’m not, but I have threatened a couple of times…I hope those remedies work out for you, because I know (through Cals) how annoying it can be!

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