I’m sticking with bullet points because things feel all over the place.
- On Saturday morning, L said “I think I’m getting my period.” And I was like, “Um, you are not due for your period until Wednesday or Thursday, so . . .?” And she said, “Well, I’m having cramps and I usually only get cramps the day of my period.” But her period didn’t come. The cramps went away on Sunday, and she took a test. Nothing there. I explained that things that have “never happened” during your menstrual cycle will start happening when you are TTC because that’s just the weird way the world works. BUT I also said that menstrual cramps on 9 DPO could be a good thing. You’d think I’d be more helpful, having actually been pregnant before, but the only sign I had before I was officially pregnant was feeling run down like I was getting sick. In the prior two years, however, I felt everything from twinges and cramps to nausea and spotting. She decided not to test again until Thursday. Obviously we are both hoping this will be it, and . . .it just feels impossible to believe that could ever happen. Although I know it does. Just not to us, right?
- Late Thursday/Friday, Ansel went from sort of walking between things to full scale free ranging all the time. Like, he’s just walking everywhere, all the time. I didn’t realize that there were levels to walking – first they master a couple of steps, then a few in a row, then small spaces, and then finally no end in sight walking. He still occasionally tumbles to the floor, or does a sort of weird lunge into things, but he stands up and keeps on going.
- Other things Ansel started doing a lot more this weekend: Saying “No”, hugging and kissing the dogs, obsessively playing with the overhead light remote.
- The shit with my colleague continues to plague my work life. It was supposed to come to an end on Friday, but she decided she couldn’t be at that meeting, so it’s still a fucking thing. After a good talk with my therapist, I got some clarity on my boundaries and what I needed to do in order to make this whole thing work for me. I guess we’ll see what comes of it. My boss was NOT AMUSED on Friday when she decided to bail. My boss is a sweet, bird like woman who gives us stones on the equinox and sells do-terra oils on the side. But today she sent a no-shit-taking e-mail and told me in no uncertain terms she’s over this bullshit. But I don’t think it will necessarily be over.
- Ansel hit 13 months! Did I tell you my process about how to talk about my kids age? I did weeks until after 12, then only months. I’ll stick with months till he’s two, then it’s just years with some modifiers. When people tell me about their 45 month old my eyes go funny and I tune out because I am NOT a math person.
- Ansel hasn’t puked in three weeks (knock on whatever wood-like surface is in your vacinity) and last night enjoyed some brisket with friends.
- Lookit all the gay families at my awesome church!
- Also, can we talk about how cute it is when my partner and our son wear matching overalls?