Hiatus! (15w3d)

Apologies to anyone out there who waits with baited breath for my semi-weekly updates. Girl was busy.

Last Monday I left for Atlanta, GA for a three day work meeting. On Wednesday, La flew out and met me at the fancy work hotel. On Thursday, we met up with a couple of our besties and our goddaughters, who moved to North Carolina a year ago, and who we haven’t seen since.

So, I didn’t really have time for blogging, ya know? (Although I always have time to read everyone else’s blogs, and am super stoked about the Librarian’s BFP and PepiBebe’s BFP!! Yippee!)

What do I want to tell you about the last week? Hmmm . . .

  • I continue to be grateful to work with people who I find smart, engaging, critical thinkers. And I’m so glad to do work I love and value. I get super excited about what I do every year at this meeting, but after a year that felt so very long with fertility treatments (and therefore really sucked a lot of my identity away), I am even more excited and grateful. I am also now harboring a fair amount of fear about how, exactly, I will be able to leave my job for a few months to take care of baby seafoam – something that, until now, really felt far away and unimaginable.
  • If you haven’t already, ALL of you (because I assume that if you read my blog you are either queer and trying to get knocked up or infertile and trying to get knocked up or both) need to go out and purchase What Makes a Baby by Cory Silverberg.  WHY? Because it is, 100% hands down, the BEST book for answering that very question, especially if your family’s story isn’t reflected by the vast majority of media.


I had a really beautiful moment with this book during my trip. Our goddaughter’s were conceived via IVF, and their heterosexual parents needed some help in the way of a sperm donor as well. Thus, this book has been super helpful for them in beginning the conversation (yes, with their not-yet-3-year-olds) about how they came about. But my moment was different. When I got to the page of the book about babies being born (I looked for an image but couldn’t find one) either vaginally or via c-section, the Bug pointed to the picture and asked “what’s that?” regarding the vaginal delivery. I told her, “Sometimes babies are born by coming through the vagina, in between the legs.” “Through the vulva?” she asked. “Yes, bug, through the vulva.” More proof that yes, it works to teach your kids the correct language for their bodies! It made me feel all kinds of fuzzy to be having a good, age appropriate sex talk with a three year old! We also talked about the baby in my uterus (not my tummy. the baby is not in my tummy.) and when she would get to meet it. It was so lovely!

  • I’m really glad we are only having one baby right now. I hella respect all y’all who are carrying or have twins, and I adore my goddaughters and I know that I went from 0 (no children) to 1,000 (two three year olds) in seconds, but holyshit . . . Since we got back home, I have been in love with the silence of my life. I will enjoy it while it lasts, and know that even one baby will be mighty loud. mental parenting note: no recorders/wind instruments for toddlers.
  • I’m excited that there may be an end in sight to the same-sex marriage shenanigans in this country, mostly so we can sink resources into other things (like safety and health and housing for LGBTQ folks.) And, I’m excited that after ONE MORE TRIP (our marriage license from June is invalid due to the circumstances, but we can get a legit one any ol’ day we please!) La and I will be 100%, fully recognized as married. And we finally get the shot gun lesbian wedding we always dreamed about.
  • I got a nomination for the “Sisterhood of the World Bloggers Award” and I sure am grateful, and I probably won’t be playing along because the survey things kind of exhaust me. But, I really enjoy being able to check out new blogs, so I’m going to recommend 10 of my faves:
  • I did some serious maternity clothes shopping with my mom, and am excited to be mostly full time in them these days. I am maintaining my skinny jeans with the belly band (didn’t find any skinny style maternity jeans that I liked) and can do regular shirts as long as they are on the longer side. I also caught some folks giving my belly the once over at the airport yesterday, which makes me think I might becoming more obvious. I’ll get La to take a good picture and show you all.
  • I turn 33 on Friday! (Seafoam will be 16 weeks!) A year ago when I blew out my candles, I wished to be pregnant this year on my birthday. I’m really excited to report this might be the first time I’ve ever had a birthday wish come true!
  • Last weekend, the best mother-in-law ever had an overnight in Denver (she’s a flight attendant) and spent her less-than-12-hours helping us (and when I say “us” I mean “La”) install a new kitchen sink. 6712_10152758891324419_996009956129799100_n 1794534_10152758267659419_3632015748931540653_n

Like usual when it comes to house projects, it was a little more difficult than anticipated, and included sawing down the counters to make room. But I’m so glad! Our old sink was gross white plastic and it got stained like crazy. Plus, it had two sections which is bad when you don’t have a bathtub in your house and you’re going to need a place to wash a baby soon! It took them all night, so I was happy to do my part by shop vac-ing the sawdust off of everything the next morning.

Despite bullet points, this is much longer than I anticipated! I hope you feel adequately caught up on the events of the last week or so. The final news? Apparently I can’t go an hour without either eating or feeling like the hungriest ever. I guess this is better than nausea, but it does mean careful lunch bag packing lest I fall pray to the candy-donut-carb fest that is the break room kitchen.


16 thoughts on “Hiatus! (15w3d)

  1. man that is a beautiful sink!

    My favourite maternity jeans were from H&M. They were so super comfortable and pretty flattering. I liked that they had belt loops to help keep them where I wanted them.

    Happy Birthday!

  2. Sounds like a lot of wonderful updates in your world right now. I can’t believe you 16 weeks already, I can’t wait to see that babies face one day on here! Thanks for the acknowledgement of my blog as well.

  3. Thanks for the heads up on the book, I have a very comprehensive book about sex/bodies/families that is very inclusive of same-sex couples and alternative conception, but it’s probably more suited for ages 6+. Gap maternity has nice skinny jeans, but I wish I had got the full panel instead of the demi… by the time I got huge the demi band was not comfy.

  4. 1) happy almost birthday! 33 is my lucky number. Enjoy it! 2) thank you for the shout out! 3) major props on the new sink! Impressive! 4) you keep popping into my mind–glad to hear from you!

  5. I’m so gonna buy that book lol haha I am so going to be one of those who refuses to wear maternity clothes until I absolutely have to. I’m going back to wear hair ties as extenders and that’s that! lol

  6. Wow. You’ve been busy, hun! Can’t believe how fast time is travelling!

    Thanks for the book suggestion, we’re trying to find a couple of LGBT books and books around how they were made to fit in amongst our other books, so this is great. There’s one called “and then there was me” which I’m trying to source – that’s apparently a good one also.

    Glad all is swell. X

  7. Thanks for the book recommendation. I’ve actually wondered a bit about how I will tell my future offspring how babies are made, in light of the fact that they would be conceived through…er… less traditional means.

    Of course, by the time I have to tackle that particular issue there will likely be an entire section in the children’s bookstore.

    I’m glad things are progressing nicely, from baby to sink!

  8. Hi! I’m going back at least a week to catch up with everyone’s blog but as I was scrolling down this picture caught my attention. I LOVE this book! I used it as part of a reading list I put together for a queer inclusive school policy project. Anyway just wanted to add my praise hope you’re doing well!

  9. Thanks for the update! Yay for good work and good conversations with 3-year-olds and home improvement and your birthday! And of course for baby Seafoam!
    In terms of books, you probably already know this one, but “It’s Not the Stork” is a good one for little kids too. And those authors also wrote “It’s So Amazing” and “It’s Perfectly Normal” for older kids and adolescents.

    • I LOVE Robie Harris’ books! She was just in town yesterday giving a talk about “its perfectly normal” and I just adore her approach to taking about sex and bodies with kids!

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